I am tired.

“I am tired.”

Paula Houston, Ed. D.

Chief Equity Officer | Office of Healthcare Equity
Associate Vice President for Medical Affairs | University of Washington
Affiliate Professor, Department of Family Medicine

I am tired. The Office of Healthcare Equity (OHCE) has been in existence only for 2.5 years and we have just released our fifth statement expressing outrage and condemning the murder of a Black person in this country.  I am tired of hearing that our systems are broken, when we know that they are working exactly as they were designed to. Our criminal justice and healthcare systems were built on the ideology of white supremacy and have been operating as intended – to center, promote and benefit whiteness, while oppressing, dehumanizing, and in the case of the criminal justice system, trying at every level to subjugate and annihilate Black people. I am tired of seeing Black people in this country so damaged from internalizing racism and being indoctrinated into these systems to survive that they take on the actions and persona of the oppressors.

I am tired of seeing performative Black Lives Matter signs and old Obama posters in the homes of white people who hold positions of power in institutions and have the responsibility to affect change, but whose actions demonstrate daily that they intend to maintain the status quo as they check the diversity box.

I am tired of receiving reports of Black students, Black staff, Black faculty, and Black trainees who are suffering in silence or screaming into a void, until, as a last-ditch, desperate effort, they reach out to our office as they are trying to survive, do the work they envision to change our system and to make a difference.

I am tired of hearing of Black patients in our system being subject to racist behavior and disparate treatment by some of the very people who are supposed to be committed to caring for them.

I am tired, yet I am still here, and I intend to be here because I must.  I will continue to work with my amazing team in OHCE and with our committed leaders to dismantle the systems and structures within UW Medicine that result in Black people being devalued, harmed, and subjected to racism and bias.  Together we will deconstruct, rebuild, and rewrite racist policies, practices, and structures so that Black people in our healthcare system and communities thrive. When we achieve this for Black people, we make our system better for all people.

I will rest when the work is done.

Paula L. Houston, Ed. D.
Chief Equity Officer
Office of Healthcare Equity | UW Medicine
Associate Vice President for Medical Affairs | University of Washington
Affiliate Professor, Department of Family Medicine

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